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Free Best Man Toasts

Ishani Chatterjee Shukla
Playing best man for the first time? No worries! Here are some free best man toasts and speech ideas that would make that wedding a memorable event and you'll end up being the superstar best man of the decade!
Okay, so it's your best pal's wedding and you're his best man. This is way serious, man! The responsibilities of a best man are very important and valuable and as your buddy's best man, you've been entrusted with the best man duties of being your pal's chief assistant and pillar of support during the wedding ceremony!
You're the emergency net on which the groom can always fall back on in case of wedding day contingencies! Well, we've ruminated long enough; let's get down to the brass tacks now! We'll start with ideas on writing and delivering the wedding speech before going towards free best man toasts.

Get the Speech Right

The ideal best man speech is a tightrope walk - literally! You walk a fine line that separates irreverence and respect to make your speech funny without bordering on the offensive. You're the best man - you're supposed to know most individual traits and personal quirks of the bride and the groom!
And yes, you should use this knowledge to make your speech original, interesting and give it a humorous edge. However, when including idiosyncrasies and anecdotes in your speech and making personal allusions, make sure these are understood by everyone in the audience and no one is left on glue!
Also, make sure you don't make innocently offensive comments about the bride and the groom. Remember, it's their wedding day - the biggest day of their lives together - and such trifles may not be appreciated or forgiven! Also, before proceeding to pen down the speech, consider the personalities of the groom and the bride and the wedding theme.
If both of them are pranksters and appreciate jokes, then you may take the chance of edging slightly towards being outrageous without overdoing it - remember, there are other people attending as well and it may not be necessary that the rest of the audience shares the matrimonial couple's broad mindedness and humor-tolerance-threshold!
Lots of free best man speech templates and sample wedding speeches are available online and you can modify them to suit the occasion in case you feel too lazy or inept to write one yourself! Here is a best man speech example of how you can modify and customize free best man speeches to suit the occasion.
To start with, I would like to welcome all of you to this very special celebration of Thomas and Karen's matrimonial union. Before I hand you over to the father of the bride I would sincerely like to thank the bridesmaids and flower girls for doing a great job in helping Karen look so stunning. As for Thomas, he looks genuinely stunned! 
I'm honored and sincerely grateful to Thomas for giving me this opportunity for playing the best man for the first time in my life. That translates into 'please pardon any slip of the tongue (or any other object) on my part during the speech as I'm a freshman in this domain'! 
Thomas - you're a lucky guy! You got Karen who is beautiful, smart, funny and a great cook! Karen, you're lucky too to have got Thomas, who is, well .....Thomas! I'm not very good with stories but here's some marital advice that I feel would be valuable for the precious couple here:
  • Set the ground rules and make it clear who the boss is; after that, do whatever she asks you to!
  • Remember the 4 rings that are nondetachable appendages of married life - engagement ring, wedding ring, suffering and enduring - and accept them unquestioningly.
  • Don't forget the times when you buy her flowers - she is aware of your guilt and remembers each such occasion and the reason behind their occurrence!
It has been an honor and a great privilege being the best man at this very special wedding. With overwhelming joy, may I ask you all to raise your glasses in toast to the bride, the groom and the bar staff - but for whom we would not be holding and refilling these glasses today!

The Toast Tops the Cake

Indeed, the toast is the cherry that tops the speech, though it comes last! After delivering the speech, it is your time to deliver the toast to the newly wed couple as you ask everyone to raise their glasses and stand up. The toast should be witty, profound and meaningful at the same time, besides being precise!
Remember what Polonius (Hamlet, Act 2, Scene 2, 86-92), said when he pronounced these words - Brevity is the soul of wit! Here are some sample best man toasts that you may Roger, alter or customize to suit the occasion
  • Here's to the newly weds; may they keep the lamp of their love burning through all ups and downs!
  • Here's to the groom - who managed to keep his head even as he lost his heart - and the bride who took it!
  • Here's to a sweetheart, a bottle and a true lover - may the first always remain beautiful, the second full and the third ever faithful!
  • Here's to the bride - may she forever love the groom all the same despite knowing everything about him!
  • May the love you share be modern enough to accommodate the changing times and orthodox enough to last till eternity!
We are adding some free funny best man toasts without which this item would appear incomplete.
  • Here's to the bride and the groom - may all your ups and downs remain confined between the sheets!
  • Here's to the bride for opting for X (groom's name) despite my warnings about him!
  • Here's to the newly weds, and all the gorgeous bridesmaids! Now that I've complimented you (gesturing towards the bridesmaids), please return the favor by leaving your phone numbers with me!
  • Here's to our wives and the loves of our lives - may they never cross each other's paths!
  • As my toast to the couple, here's a last piece of advise for the groom - whenever in doubt, always say you're right, dear.
Make intelligent use of these toasts and make that wedding a memorable event where your début as the best man would assume anecdotal proportions and will be fondly recalled at every get-together, even years after the actual ceremony!